Get ready to laugh out loud with our amazing collection of Joan Rivers jokes! Whether you're a fan, fanatic, follower, or just someone who loves a good celebrity joke, you won't want to miss out on these silly, corny, and downright hilarious jokes. Our carefully curated selection of jokes includes the very best of Joan Rivers humor, from witty one-liners to clever puns and tricky riddles. And of course, we've got all the most memorable quotes from the beloved comedian and television host to tickle your funny bone. So why waste your time with boring jokes when you can experience the absolute best in Joan Rivers humor? Come on over and join the fun – because everyone knows that jokes are the best medicine for a good laugh!Back to Movie
Elizabeth Taylor was so fat that whenever she went to London in a red dress, 30 passengers would try to board her.
I don't exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.
I hate housework. You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later, you have to start all over again.
I made so many jokes about poor Russell Crowe, he once knocked on my dressing room door, and told me he wanted to go out on this chat show we were on to laugh with me. Now he's ruined it. I can't make another joke about him.
I was dating a football player. He was so dumb. The man could not count to 21 unless he was naked.
I wish I had a twin so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery.
If I were to see three people that make tons of money and have no talent, I would not watch you guys, I'd watch the Kardashians.
I’ve had so much plastic surgery, when I die, they will donate my body to Tupperware.
Madonna is so hairy. When she lifted her arm, I thought it was Tina Turner in her armpit.
My breasts are so low, now I can have a mammogram and a pedicure at the same time.
My sex life is so bad, my G-spot has been declared a historical landmark.
My vagina is like Newark. Men know it's there, but they don't want to visit.
People say money is not the key to happiness, but I always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.
RIP Joan Rivers. She was 80 years old. Her nose was 31, and her lips sadly were only 22. So young!
You want to get Cindy Crawford confused? Ask her to spell ‘mum’ backwards.
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