Stevie Wonder Jokes

Apparently Stevie Wonder has stopped writing music. He dropped his pen.

George Bush is so stupid, he went to a concert and waved to Stevie Wonder!

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife?

Answer: Neither has he.

Have you heard that Johnnie Cochran has a new job?

Answer: He's getting a driving licence for Stevie Wonder.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new car?

Answer: Neither has he.

How do you confuse Stevie Wonder?

Answer: Glue all the door knobs to a wall.

If Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles had a boy band it would be called “what direction”!

If you think your life is bad, just remember that Stevie Wonder will never ever see Jennifer Lawrence’s leaked nudes.

Stevie Wonder and Jack Nicklaus are in a bar. Nicklaus turns to Wonder and says, "How is the singing career going?"

Stevie Wonder says, "Not too bad, the latest album has gone into the top 10, so all in all I think it is pretty good. By the way how is the golf."

Nicklaus replies: "Not too bad, I am not winning as much as I used to but I'm still making a bit of money. I have some problems with my swing but I think I've got that right now."

"I always find that when my swing goes wrong I need to stop playing for a while and think about it, then the next time I play it seems to be all right," says Stevie.

"You play golf!?" asks Jack.
Stevie says, "Yes, I have been playing for years."

"But I thought you were blind; how can you play golf if you are blind?" Jack asks.

"I get my caddie to stand in the middle of the fairway and he calls to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him, then when I get to where the ball lands the caddie moves to the green or further down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice," explains Stevie.

"But how do you putt?" Nicklaus wondered.

"Well," says Stevie, "I get my caddie to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball to the sound of his voice."

Nicklaus says, "What is your handicap?"

"Well, I play off scratch," Stevie assures Jack. Nicklaus is incredulous and says to Stevie, "We must play a game sometime."

Wonder replies, "Well, people don't take me seriously so I only play for money, and I never play for less than $100,000 a hole."

Nicklaus thinks it over and says, "OK, I'm up for that. When would you like to play?"

"I don't care - any night next week is OK with me."

Stevie Wonder got a cheese grater for Christmas. He said it was the most violent book he'd ever read!

Stevie Wonder recently told his wife that he wants to see other people.

Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder?

Answer: Endless love.

What do you have when you have Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and the O.J. Simpson jury?

Answer: *Fourteen* people who can't see worth a damn!

What goes….. Click click click……..is that it? Click click click……..is that it? Click click click……..is that it?

Answer: Stevie Wonder doing a Rubik’s cube!

What is the definition of endless love?

Answer: Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis

What’s black and screams?

Answer: Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

Why can't Stevie Wonder see his friends?

Answer: He is busy making good music.

Why do single women take advice from other single women?

Answer: That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions!

Why was Stevie Wonder's wife upset?

Answer: Because he told her he wanted to see other people.